Around the wish to respond to the world and its demands with a “yes,” and not a “no,” comes the circumstance wherein someone makes a demand of us such that if we say “no” to them we are denying the integrity of ourselves and the integrity of the relationship we have with them. The choice is
- do we say yes to the other and by so doing deny our sense of what is right and good, or
- do we say yes to ourselves and by so doing risk the other feeling rendered wrong or unimportant to us.
The answer, as always is “yes.”
As Endel suggests, this can be seen as an application of the Law of Three. We each hold a position which is affirming of our expectations but is a denying the other’s. What many have said (Ron I think most clearly) is that the creative response is not to deny the reality of either perspective but to hold them both in loving tension which regards our relationship—our love for each other—as a greater reality than either of our perspectives. With the affirming and the denying held together by reconciling love we create a new way of being.
